Matt Damon Has a Ponytail, Time to Devote Your Afternoon to Watching This Mesmerizing Gif

Matt Damon could shave half his head and dye the other half green, and we’d still want to go on a romantic tropical vacation with him. But even we had to do a double-take at his latest hairstyle, a swept-back messy pony that gives even the most glorious Hollywood man-buns a run for their money.

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We’ve seen him bald. He’s discussed his grays. But we’ve never seen his mane quite so majestic before. Yes, we know it has to do with his role in the upcoming The Great Wall, but rather than just settle for such a mundane explanation, we’re going to come up with a few reasons of our own.

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• He’s taking over for Fabio and posing for the cover of romance novels. (You should see his deeply unbuttoned shirt game.)
• Now that Chris Hemsworth has gone short, Damon sees his chance to finally play a superhero and nab the role of Thor. (Why should Ben Affleck get to have all the fun?)
• He’s created his own celebrity fragrance and thought long hair would look better for the commercial. (Wind machines are de rigeur these days.)
• He’s not going to let that clown DiCaprio get all the long-hair attention.
• Why should female celebrities get all the fun filming Pantene commercials?!
• Because he’s worth it, darn it.

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— Alex Apatoff
Follow @nicefunalex